The Value of Family Dinner Hour

by: Sherri Gnish

Often we hear people talk about how their kitchen is the “hub” of their household… the place where everyone gathers together to talk about their day, eat and spend time together. For me, the family dinner hour is the basis of some of my fondest childhood memories of sitting around my grandmother’s kitchen table.

My grandmother presided over the table, handing out portions of meat, potatoes and fresh vegetables from their garden going from the youngest child to the oldest adult. But when it came time to eat and to bless the food, this is where my grandfather presided. My grandfather was an immensely quiet individual – I have no memories of him ever having a complete conversation with me, yet his presence is unmistakable in my early memories. At the start of a meal he would always say the Lord’s prayer and everyone would fall on the meal – voices talking over one another, laughter and chatter resounding around the table, the conversation nearly as good as the meal. Once we had all eaten and begun on our dessert, my grandmother would reach for the large family Bible and proceed to read a passage from it along with a gospel message from her small “Today” book. The book was then passed to someone at the table who read the corresponding prayer.
 

Several years ago, I was at my grandmother's home for dinner – my first one since my grandfather had passed away a few year before. I was somewhat surprised, I think to realize that no one was going to step into my grandfather’s shoes, taking his place at the head of the table and reciting that beloved prayer. Everyone at the table bowed their head and a silence fell as each said their own private prayer of blessing on the food we were about to eat. I felt suspended in time somehow – half expecting to look up and see my grandfather standing there, his quiet presence filling the room as he waited for everyone to notice him standing and fall into silence so that he could begin. It was clear however that not one of us felt that my grandfather’s place could be taken by anyone else and for that I am grateful.

We are beginning a new generation of family dinners with our own family and have decided to continue the tradition of a family worship at the dinner table nightly. Our methods will vary from those that my grandparents had, but that spirit will be the same. I don’t want to recreate the tradition that my grandparents had but create our own so that the image of my grandfather presiding over the meal will not fade from my memory and I will always hear the Dutch accent coloring his words and phrases as he blessed our meal. He gave me an amazing gift over those dinners so long ago… the gift of the spirit and a tradition that no matter how it is changed will always be the one that he began – a legacy of family dinners that will pass down through the generations.

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